Hi All! This is a long one...hope you find time to enjoy it... :-)
The sun is setting behind the palm trees. The very thin elderly man who has been raking the rice paddy in front of me all day long is heading home. I just finished a plate of steam veggies that I bought from the market, and now my feet are resting on the side of my balcony, as I ponder the reality that I will be flying away from here in 8 days…and as I am deep in reflection on my five months of life here in Bali.
Lets go back in time for a moment…when I was seven and spent a week in the hospital after being diagnosed with diabetes, I fell in love with the idea of being someone who’s career was dedicated to helping others feel better. Resultantly, my desire to become a doctor was born. For the next thirty years, this seed of desire never stopped growing, albeit often only lurking in the back of my mind. Although I followed a wavering path…graduating from college with a business degree after attending four different colleges, then backpacking around Australia and New Zealand for six months, selling pizza in Italy for three months, selling Prozac for three years, and then selling insulin pumps for 2 years…I never let my childhood dream drift very far from my mind. Once I discovered the existence of a holistic minded med school, my wavering path ended. I committed myself to the 5-year program, and at the age of 35, I became Dr. Jody Stanislaw.
As you all well know, I was then drawn to move to Thailand…where I worked for eleven months…then left in December to come to Bali…and have been here writing a book ever since. (And doing a lot of other wonderful things here too ☺ ) As I sit here on my balcony, enjoying the bright pink and orange paint strokes in the sky left by the setting sun, I am acutely aware of the uniqueness of my path. Almost every girlfriend I can think of is likely in this moment, finishing work and/or making dinner for her husband and children. I can’t think of anyone else I know from high school or college who is likely sitting by themselves, in a tropical environment, unemployed but doing fine living on $20/day, relaxing on their balcony, surrounded by rice paddies and palm trees…and thus, I’ve been pondering, “How the hell did I end up here?” and, “I wonder what’s in store for me next?”
For the past thirty years, my focus and drive was always to some degree focused on becoming a physician. Being someone who always sets their sights high, I had decided becoming a doctor was the only answer to having a career dedicated to helping others. My focus was single pointed…I was going to achieve the highest-ranking career within the field of healthcare; anything else I deemed would be a copout. Then I did it for a year…sat in an office for 8 hours a day, handing out advice on supplements and herbs and nutrition…and I realized this is not what I want to do. I had never actually thought about the actual day to day practice of being a physician…sitting inside all day long, rather sedentarily…I had only focused on my idea of wanting to be someone who helped others improve their health and enjoy their life.
So I did it for a year and quit. And now I’ve been here in Bali, with more free time in a week than most of my friends have in a year...which has allowed me more time than I’ve ever spent in my life to think about how I can be a doctor outside of the box; to be someone dedicated to helping others feel better, and at the same time loving what I do. So here is what I know I love to do: I love facilitating groups. I love leading movement classes…dance, yoga, exercise. I love leading meditation. I love having discussions on spirituality. I love teaching others about the body and the importance of good nutrition. I love giving lectures on health. I love to meet and interact with people. I love to inspire others to improve their health. I love a dynamic work environment. I love travel….
"Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision is the promise of what you shall one day be; your ideal is the prophecy of what you shall at last unveil"....James Allen
I believe each one of us have unique gifts we are meant to share with the world. I believe that what life is asking each one of us is to become clear on what our respective gifts are, and then dedicate ourselves to giving them to the world the best we can, no matter the doubts and fears we may have about pursuing our deepest desires. Living life like this is a win-win: when we are living out our greatest gifts is when we are most satisfied, happy, peaceful, and joyful; when we are living out our greatest gifts, the world around us is optimally benefiting as well…everyone wins! And everyone is happy!
"It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are difficult."...by Imnot Sure
With this realization, I am dedicated to living out my greatest gifts. The vision I have for this thus far is to be a guest lecture at various health events, lead group discussions on health, lead movement classes….with my goal being to lead my own health retreats around the world. How am I going to carry this out? The same way all big visionaries carry out their dreams…one step at a time.
"If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with success unexpected in common hours. " ...Henry David Thoreau
Speaking of having an abundance of time to ponder life, I’ve also made another realization…I’ve realized the purpose of life. I’m serious. Growing up in the high success driven city of ritzy Bellevue, it was clear to me that the most important things in life were to have a professional job, make lots of money, look beautiful and stylish always, have a gorgeous home, be accepted by and acceptable to society…and basically make sure I had my shit together at all times. After my thirty-six years here on earth, I’ve realized this is all…bull shit.
I think I would’ve loved pursuing a career as a fulltime yoga instructor. I haven’t made much money in the past few years but I think I’m getting along pretty fabulously given the fact that I’ve been chillin’ here in Bali for months. I can’t remember the last time I put makeup on or bought a new outfit but you know what, I don’t really care. I have a gorgeous home…I just happen to have a renter living in it, which is cool because she is paying for my mortgage, as well as a nice chunk of my monthly student loan payment, thank you very much. I certainly haven’t always had my shit together at all times, but that’s the craziest thing I’ve ever heard…no one I know has….nor are we supposed to.
"We act as though comfort and luxury were the chief requirements in life, when all we need to make us really happy is something to be enthusiastic about."...Charles Kingsley
So what is the purpose of life as I see it now? For all of us to be the best person we can be. Life is never really about whatever event is going on at any particular moment….be it if we achieve a goal or not, become ‘successful’ or not (whatever that means), experience a divorce, a health challenge, get laid off, … Whatever is going on is simply an opportunity to strengthen being the best version of ourselves. As I look at my life…diabetes has taught me the importance of making health a priority, perseverance, diligence, discipline. Having divorced parents has taught me independence, flexibility, the importance of healthy communication. Being single has given me time to discover who I am without the influence of another, patience, and a level of appreciation for my future significant other that will make him the luckiest husband in the world. That’s it. Nothing on the outside really matters. Its all about being the best version of myself, no matter what life brings me.
But I'm humble..."The person who thinks he has found the ultimate truth is wrong."...Joseph Campbell
Yet, with this purpose in life, one can never lose. Lost your job? Cool! Its great practice for strengthening one’s faith, patience, and diligence. Car get wrecked? Cool! Great practice for letting go of material things and being happy anyway. Everything in life is just a teacher…endless opportunities for us to polish our characters.
Now, having said all of this, it might sound like I’m all blissed out, skipping around like a peace child from the 70’s. Well, that’s not exactly the case. My old goals…the desire for money, the success, the good looks…die hard. I often feel like a referee, making sure the opposing voices of the old and the new inside my head stay well behaved and don’t get too out of control and make me go crazy. For example, one day I can hear, “Oh my! More wrinkles! I must do something to stop this!” So then my wise voice chips in and says, “Hey Jode. You don’t look 25 anymore because you’re 36. Its okay if you have a few wrinkles. Let go of the past. You are a beautiful person, inside and out!”
So as I sit here by myself on my balcony…now in the pitch dark and with my ears filled by all the sounds of the nighttime creatures singing their songs…I am being given the opportunity to fill myself with gratitude…gratitude for this time to reflect, for the warm fresh air, for the food in my belly, for safety, for my ability to type and write and think, for my comfy bed calling my name... How about you? What opportunity is life presenting to you right now? I’d love to hear about it…IN PERSON! when I’m back in Seattle in 23 days!
Love to you all,
Dr. J
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Jody's Top Ten!....take 2!
I had so much fun with the last one...and so much more to share...that I had to do it again. Enjoy!
What I Will Miss about Living in Bali:
#10 -Sharing my room with all my four legged gecko friends as they scatter about on the ceiling and walls...and also having totally become accustomed to other little nature creatures coming and going as they please. (Given how we as humans on this planet are out numbered, by I'm sure something like a trillion of them to one of us, I have come to realize how normal and natural it is for them to be present absolutely anywhere....makes me laugh at the thought of how our mentality in the States is to freak out if a single ant or spider is in 'our' home.)
#9 -Using my bicycle as my sole transportation source, easily riding my bicycle everywhere I need to go in town.
#8-Tabloids? Celebrity gossip? What do those words mean? I don't recall.
#7 -Spending my morning sitting on my balcony and eating the fresh papaya that is brought to me every morning by the family whom I rent my room from while enjoying my sweeping view of bright green rice paddies, swaying palm trees, and three towering volcanoes in the distance....and spending my evenings watching all the glowing green fire flies dance around in the sky...now this is truly a slice of paradise.
#6-Being reminded on a daily basis of the inherent abundance of nature and of the universe...the amount of green foliage that grows in this town is astounding. I bet if humans were to abandon this town for just a few weeks, it would become completely overgrown and overtaken by Nature's abundance.
#5 -Observing the daily diligence and devotion of the locals working the rice fields...and being awed at at the joyful simplicity with which they live.
#4.5 - (I had so much on my list...had to just fit a few extras in. :-) Having my teeth cleaned at a perfectly clean and respectable place for $30; Seeing a very respectably trained doctor for under $50. No insurance needed.
#4 - Being able to enjoy the tropical rain storms while wearing my shorts and a tank top, confident that the sun will soon be shining again in an hour or two.
#3.5 - (yep, had to fit this one in too :-) Listening to the local boys who live next door to me play their guitars and sing with all their hearts LaBamba, and the exact same Rolling Stones, and Led Zepplin tunes in perfect English (although they don't speak English) at least 2-3 nights a week. (The first night I heard this, I wondered to myself if there was a concert going on somewhere.) (Well, to be fair, there have been many a nights in which this one would fit in the other top ten list...:-)
#3 - Walking by and saying hello on a daily basis to the countless local woman who make a habit of carrying all of their shopping, food, bags, sticks, plants, gigantic jugs of water, baskets of crafts or local snacks for sale....gracefully on top of their head. (I have yet to see a single elderly woman who walks hunched over. No matter if they are 80 or 90, they have beautifully straight spines.)
#2 - Paying a local $1 to chop the top off of a freshly fallen coconut as I proceed to stick a straw in it, savor the tasty juice, and then scoop out and eat the yummy coconut flesh....and having this be the norm over buying a latte at Starbucks.... I'm totally serious.
#1-Being able to ponder on a DAiLY basis if I am in the mood for yet another fantastic hour long massage...for $8! Yes, $8! After having this be my reality for the past 18 months, this is going to be a tough one to live without!
Why I am Excited to Come Home!
#10 - To no longer have to pick up the tiny gecko poops so lovingly left on my floor. To be able to hear myself think at night as I fall asleep since I will no longer be sleeping in a room located next to the thousands of frogs who love to croak and croak all night long.
#9 -To be able to entertain the possibility of attending my 3rd Burning Man Festival in Nevada this August!?!
#8 - Fresh wild Alaskan King Salmon! On the grill!
#7 - Going to the movies! and seeing a movie in English!
#6 - Being able to rendezvous in Vancouver BC with two of the coolest people I met while living in Bali who happen to live in Calgary!
#5 - Flying Apron Bakery in Fremont! ...gluten and sugar free, whole food and natural ingredients, and still the best damn tasting treats around!
#4 - Summertime in Seattle....the best and only time to be in Seattle!
#3 - Hiking along the glorious trails and the breathtaking scenery afforded by the spectacular mountains of the Pacific NW.
#2 - To no longer have to play the explain-yourself game... "I'm from Seattle. Worked in Thailand last year. Here since Christmas time. Writing a book. And you?" To be in the company of friends and family whom have known me for so long that without even having to speak, they know exactly what I'm saying.
#1 - To not just sleep in a bed, but in a home. To relax on my mom's couch and have my heart filled with her company as much as I know her heart will be filled with mine.
...Sending my love to you all, here from my desk that I am sitting at, at my 3 week health resort gig! (...Doing exactly what I did in Thailand, to fill in for a woman who wanted to take 3 weeks off to go to Europe, that I serendipitously landed after just happening to meet and chat with her in town!... a nice bit of extra cash before I leave town!)
Touch down in Seattle is June 14!
Love and hugs from Bali!
Jody :-)
What I Will Miss about Living in Bali:
#10 -Sharing my room with all my four legged gecko friends as they scatter about on the ceiling and walls...and also having totally become accustomed to other little nature creatures coming and going as they please. (Given how we as humans on this planet are out numbered, by I'm sure something like a trillion of them to one of us, I have come to realize how normal and natural it is for them to be present absolutely anywhere....makes me laugh at the thought of how our mentality in the States is to freak out if a single ant or spider is in 'our' home.)
#9 -Using my bicycle as my sole transportation source, easily riding my bicycle everywhere I need to go in town.
#8-Tabloids? Celebrity gossip? What do those words mean? I don't recall.
#7 -Spending my morning sitting on my balcony and eating the fresh papaya that is brought to me every morning by the family whom I rent my room from while enjoying my sweeping view of bright green rice paddies, swaying palm trees, and three towering volcanoes in the distance....and spending my evenings watching all the glowing green fire flies dance around in the sky...now this is truly a slice of paradise.
#6-Being reminded on a daily basis of the inherent abundance of nature and of the universe...the amount of green foliage that grows in this town is astounding. I bet if humans were to abandon this town for just a few weeks, it would become completely overgrown and overtaken by Nature's abundance.
#5 -Observing the daily diligence and devotion of the locals working the rice fields...and being awed at at the joyful simplicity with which they live.
#4.5 - (I had so much on my list...had to just fit a few extras in. :-) Having my teeth cleaned at a perfectly clean and respectable place for $30; Seeing a very respectably trained doctor for under $50. No insurance needed.
#4 - Being able to enjoy the tropical rain storms while wearing my shorts and a tank top, confident that the sun will soon be shining again in an hour or two.
#3.5 - (yep, had to fit this one in too :-) Listening to the local boys who live next door to me play their guitars and sing with all their hearts LaBamba, and the exact same Rolling Stones, and Led Zepplin tunes in perfect English (although they don't speak English) at least 2-3 nights a week. (The first night I heard this, I wondered to myself if there was a concert going on somewhere.) (Well, to be fair, there have been many a nights in which this one would fit in the other top ten list...:-)
#3 - Walking by and saying hello on a daily basis to the countless local woman who make a habit of carrying all of their shopping, food, bags, sticks, plants, gigantic jugs of water, baskets of crafts or local snacks for sale....gracefully on top of their head. (I have yet to see a single elderly woman who walks hunched over. No matter if they are 80 or 90, they have beautifully straight spines.)
#2 - Paying a local $1 to chop the top off of a freshly fallen coconut as I proceed to stick a straw in it, savor the tasty juice, and then scoop out and eat the yummy coconut flesh....and having this be the norm over buying a latte at Starbucks.... I'm totally serious.
#1-Being able to ponder on a DAiLY basis if I am in the mood for yet another fantastic hour long massage...for $8! Yes, $8! After having this be my reality for the past 18 months, this is going to be a tough one to live without!
Why I am Excited to Come Home!
#10 - To no longer have to pick up the tiny gecko poops so lovingly left on my floor. To be able to hear myself think at night as I fall asleep since I will no longer be sleeping in a room located next to the thousands of frogs who love to croak and croak all night long.
#9 -To be able to entertain the possibility of attending my 3rd Burning Man Festival in Nevada this August!?!
#8 - Fresh wild Alaskan King Salmon! On the grill!
#7 - Going to the movies! and seeing a movie in English!
#6 - Being able to rendezvous in Vancouver BC with two of the coolest people I met while living in Bali who happen to live in Calgary!
#5 - Flying Apron Bakery in Fremont! ...gluten and sugar free, whole food and natural ingredients, and still the best damn tasting treats around!
#4 - Summertime in Seattle....the best and only time to be in Seattle!
#3 - Hiking along the glorious trails and the breathtaking scenery afforded by the spectacular mountains of the Pacific NW.
#2 - To no longer have to play the explain-yourself game... "I'm from Seattle. Worked in Thailand last year. Here since Christmas time. Writing a book. And you?" To be in the company of friends and family whom have known me for so long that without even having to speak, they know exactly what I'm saying.
#1 - To not just sleep in a bed, but in a home. To relax on my mom's couch and have my heart filled with her company as much as I know her heart will be filled with mine.
...Sending my love to you all, here from my desk that I am sitting at, at my 3 week health resort gig! (...Doing exactly what I did in Thailand, to fill in for a woman who wanted to take 3 weeks off to go to Europe, that I serendipitously landed after just happening to meet and chat with her in town!... a nice bit of extra cash before I leave town!)
Touch down in Seattle is June 14!
Love and hugs from Bali!
Jody :-)
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Jody's Top Ten!
What I will Miss About Living in Bali
#10 - Mystery food that is so yummy but since I have absolutely no idea what's in it, I'll never be able to recreate it again.
#9 - Being mesmerized and fascinated by the devotion of the Balinese as I watch them carry out their prayer rituals on a daily basis.
#8 - Meeting fellow fascinating travelers from all around the world, around every corner I go.
#7 - Being part of a culture that is so in touch with living in tune with nature, who go to the market every morning to get their fresh food.
#6 - Seeing a dad with a huge grin on his face as he drives his three young kids also with beaming grins in their school uniforms to school...as all 4 of them are hugging each other's back as they ride on a single motorbike.
#5 - Having freshly blended papaya juice every morning for 90 cents. Buying avocados for 20 cents. (I bought one for 25 cents once and my local friend replied, "Wow, that one was expensive.") Having extraordinary meals for $1-3.
#4 - To do yoga in an open air studio surrounded by palm trees and bright green rice fields.
#3 - To be on such a sacred island that seems to attract some of the most positive minded, environmentally conscious, big hearted people from all over the world that I've ever met.
#2 - To have a glorious ocean beach to play on all day just an hour away from where I live.
#1 - The endless growth that comes from living alone in a foreign culture.
Why Its Time for Me to Come Home
#10 - To be hugged by my friends and family!! (and especially, Manana! my Queen Anne neighbor who at this point has been a friend only via email!)
#9 - My weekly phone calls to Granddad over the past 18 months have been a fabulous way for us to stay connected... but we are long overdue for a face to face date with lots of big hugs!
#8 - I am so excited to be able to ask for directions, or the time, or where this or that place is...and to not even be bothered by the concern of wondering if they understand english!
#7 - and on that note, I'm just excited to be understood by anyone I talk to for that matter! (well, at least my words will be understood....as for if what I'm really trying to communicate is grasped, that seems to be a universal challenge, regardless of any language barriers :-)
#6 - I have been without access to a kitchen for over a year and am sooo excited to buy my own food! and to know exactly what I am eating! and prepare my favorite super healthy meals! (which is really funny because when I moved to Thailand, I couldn't wait to have all my meals made for me and not have to cook. :-)
#5 - To not have to put SPF 50 on my face everyday and yet still feel that my beautiful skin is being over run with sun spots.
#4- To stomp around all my favorite familiar stomping grounds and to know exactly where I'm going with no need to ask for directions. And to not be endlessly asked as I walk around town if I am in need of a taxi.
#3 - To not be told how much something costs until I am looked at up and down and had a financial assessment done based on by appearance. To be charged the same price as everyone else. To not have to haggle for absolutely everything I buy..and then feel ripped off anyway.
#2- I woke up yesterday to bright beaming sunshine and thought, "Oh great, another day I'll be drenched in sweat."
#1- I woke up this morning to a cloudy sky and thought, "YES!"
See you all soon! Touch down in Seattle is June 14th!
#10 - Mystery food that is so yummy but since I have absolutely no idea what's in it, I'll never be able to recreate it again.
#9 - Being mesmerized and fascinated by the devotion of the Balinese as I watch them carry out their prayer rituals on a daily basis.
#8 - Meeting fellow fascinating travelers from all around the world, around every corner I go.
#7 - Being part of a culture that is so in touch with living in tune with nature, who go to the market every morning to get their fresh food.
#6 - Seeing a dad with a huge grin on his face as he drives his three young kids also with beaming grins in their school uniforms to school...as all 4 of them are hugging each other's back as they ride on a single motorbike.
#5 - Having freshly blended papaya juice every morning for 90 cents. Buying avocados for 20 cents. (I bought one for 25 cents once and my local friend replied, "Wow, that one was expensive.") Having extraordinary meals for $1-3.
#4 - To do yoga in an open air studio surrounded by palm trees and bright green rice fields.
#3 - To be on such a sacred island that seems to attract some of the most positive minded, environmentally conscious, big hearted people from all over the world that I've ever met.
#2 - To have a glorious ocean beach to play on all day just an hour away from where I live.
#1 - The endless growth that comes from living alone in a foreign culture.
Why Its Time for Me to Come Home
#10 - To be hugged by my friends and family!! (and especially, Manana! my Queen Anne neighbor who at this point has been a friend only via email!)
#9 - My weekly phone calls to Granddad over the past 18 months have been a fabulous way for us to stay connected... but we are long overdue for a face to face date with lots of big hugs!
#8 - I am so excited to be able to ask for directions, or the time, or where this or that place is...and to not even be bothered by the concern of wondering if they understand english!
#7 - and on that note, I'm just excited to be understood by anyone I talk to for that matter! (well, at least my words will be understood....as for if what I'm really trying to communicate is grasped, that seems to be a universal challenge, regardless of any language barriers :-)
#6 - I have been without access to a kitchen for over a year and am sooo excited to buy my own food! and to know exactly what I am eating! and prepare my favorite super healthy meals! (which is really funny because when I moved to Thailand, I couldn't wait to have all my meals made for me and not have to cook. :-)
#5 - To not have to put SPF 50 on my face everyday and yet still feel that my beautiful skin is being over run with sun spots.
#4- To stomp around all my favorite familiar stomping grounds and to know exactly where I'm going with no need to ask for directions. And to not be endlessly asked as I walk around town if I am in need of a taxi.
#3 - To not be told how much something costs until I am looked at up and down and had a financial assessment done based on by appearance. To be charged the same price as everyone else. To not have to haggle for absolutely everything I buy..and then feel ripped off anyway.
#2- I woke up yesterday to bright beaming sunshine and thought, "Oh great, another day I'll be drenched in sweat."
#1- I woke up this morning to a cloudy sky and thought, "YES!"
See you all soon! Touch down in Seattle is June 14th!
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